Wednesday, 12 March 2014


By Lapaka

Hugging has always been an awkward thing for me and I tried to avoid them as much as possible. I guess one of the reasons I have avoided them was due to what someone close to me once told me, that I give the weirdest hugs ever. That person was probably just joking but the power I gave those few words closed the door to one of the most amazing intimate human acts. The perfectionist in me decided I'm going to avoid hugs like a plague which I have successfully done for the past 7 to 8 years. Unfortunately I couldn't really avoid them all together so I would usually have a hug quota for the year which was about four hugs per year. However the most amazing thing happened to me a few weeks ago.

I was standing in a queue in a supermarket. I met someone I have not seen in over 10 years, we happened to be just Facebook friends because we are from the same town and we went to the same primary school. I greeted him and he replied with stretched out arms and embraced me in a hug, in my head I was thinking one to go three more for the year left. Usually my hugs lasted less then two seconds (that's how fast I want it to end). This one was different, two seconds went by and in my head I was thinking what the…??  I was not used to what was happening, the guy wouldn't let go, so I decided not to push him away but to just let the hug run it's course. Than I moved from being uncomfortable to feeling comfortable and safe in an instant (how that happened I do not know). Finally for the first time in my life I understood why people give each other hugs. Without words spoken I felt a deep sense of love, support and kindness.

I tend to think that perhaps the one of the reasons I find hugging weird simply intimacy it provides, the kind of intimacy I wasn't comfortable with and wasn't sure how to handle.

Well on that day I remember my mind being preoccupied by many things, I run into the shop with the intention to grab one item and rushing back home, however after that hug I felt at peace, it felt like all the troubles I had at that moment had miraculously disappeared and started to look insignificant, much smaller then I had originally thought. It was one of the most amazing hugging experiences (if u can call it that) I have ever had, I can still feel that positive energy just thinking about it. I have thus decided to ditch my 'hug quota' and start giving my weird hugs as they will come from a place of love, if I can make one person feel the way that hug left me feeling than I would have done my part. 

Research has shown that deep hugs have the following benefits:
  1. The nurturing touch of a hug builds trust and a sense of safety. This helps with open and honest communication.
  2. Hugs can instantly boost oxytocin levels, which heal feelings of loneliness, isolation, and anger.
  3. Holding a hug for an extended time lifts one's serotonin levels, elevating mood and creating happiness.
  4. Hugs strengthen the immune system.
  5. Hugging boosts self-esteem.
  6. Hugging relaxes muscles. Hugs release tension in the body. Hugs can take away pain; they soothe aches by increasing circulation into the soft tissues.
  7. Hugs balance out the nervous system. The galvanic skin response of someone receiving and giving a hug shows a change in skin conductance.
  8. Hugs teach us how to give and receive. There is equal value in receiving and being receptive to warmth, as to giving and sharing. Hugs educate us how love flows both ways.
  9. Hugs are so much like meditation and laughter. They teach us to let go and be present in the moment. They encourage us to flow with the energy of life. Hugs get you out of your circular thinking patterns and connect you with your heart and your feelings and your breath.
  10. The energy exchange between the people hugging is an investment in the relationship.
So if you are like me and get weirded out by hugs, think of those benefits before pulling away from that warm embrace.

Blessed Wednesday 

Sunday, 9 March 2014

African Prints

Went to Ghana almost a month ago (will post about it later). And I fell in love with everything African. And if course I came back with lots of fabrics. Like who goes to the meca of African Fabrics and doesn't come with any right? I almost went nuts choosing which to buy. Too many options.. So busy looking for ideas of what to make with them. :)

Thursday, 6 March 2014

National Day of Prayer

Passion killing has been on an increase in our country, I have written about it before here

Today 06 March 2014, The Government of the Republic of Namibia has declared the day as a National Day of Prayer on Gender Based Violence country wide. All religious denominations throughout the country are invited to take part in the prayer. National Day of Prayer is being held all over the country in all the 14 regions.

In Windhoek, the National Day of Prayer will be held at the Sam Nujoma Stadium in Katutura at 10H00 and His Excellency Hifikepunye Pohamba, President of the Republic of Namibia will address the nation.  

In the past months there has been an increasing incidents of Gender Based Violence (Passion Killings) including murder and rape reported in the country and the Government decided to declare a National Day of Prayer to ask for divine intervention on Gender Based Violence in the country.

This mass gathering is history in the making for Namibia, for the first time in our history (at least that I can remember) were people from different religious denominations are gathering, sitting and praying together for a common goal. The prayer section in Windhoek will host an Iman of Muslim Faith, a Pastor of Christian and a Rabbi of Jewish faith. At 13h00 Bells will ring in all Churches and Mosques through out the country.  

The National day of Prayer was been a controversial topic, some debating whether or not payer will decrease the killings particularly against women in this country (there are some male victims too), but one can only pray and have faith that God will listen to our prayers and a few hearts will be changed in the process.  

May all those that lost their lives rest in peace and their families be comforted by the grave of God.

"If my people, who are called by my name, will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven, and I will forgive their sin and will heal their land." 2nd Chronicles 7:14

Thursday, 27 February 2014

Stretch Your Mind

I couldn't help but share…  Source

By Fola Daniel Adelesi

Take a good look at the rubber band and imagine what happens to it when it is stretched. Maybe the women will understand better because they use it a lot for their hair. Just pick anyone and stretch it. When you do that the first time, it will try to return to its original position. When you repeat the process, the rubber will still try to return to its position. After a while, through consistent use, it becomes soft and it is enlarged. It also becomes difficult for the rubber to return to its original position. At that point, a little stretch might just break it.

Many of us need to stretch our minds like those rubbers. Those minds are too small to process the information that we need to get us to where we are going in life. If you do not stretch your mind it will not get you anywhere in life. There are so many things you picked up while you were growing that you no longer need for where you are going to. If you are not ready to unlearn those things, you will try to take them along with you and they will never help.

It is only with a stretched mind that someone will create ideas, not have the resources, but will keep believing. It is a stretched mind that lets him talk to people to convince them about his or her dreams, and there will be results at the end of the day. It is only a stretched mind that can negotiate anything that also seems impossible. When a mind is not stretched, some ideas strike you and you kill them even before they land properly.

I walk on the streets and see the things that are happening, it is always clear that much more than what people think is the problem, there is the bigger problem of the mind. Many of us think that the problem of a country like Nigeria today is just corruption. You will be shocked, if at the end of today corruption is wiped out, to see that we still have many more problems to deal with and they have nothing to do with stealing or being corrupt!

When people have a mind that has been stretched, they will do things differently and will also be easier to lead. When the leaders of a nation also have a stretched mind, they will find it easy to proffer solutions to the myriads of problems that the country has. It is because so many leaders do not have a stretched mind that they travel abroad and they cannot come back home to do simple carbon copy or copy and paste! Do you realize that we would have praised our leaders if the only thing they do in this country is to copy and paste the good things they see in other countries? Let me also add that the problem is not only with leaders but with followers as well.

 A mind that is not stretched will see too many problems to deal with. The things that are not even the problems will also be considered as the problems. You will fight the people you are not supposed to fight, and stay away from things that you are not supposed to stay away from. At a point, someone asked us in a meeting to imagine that all the money in the world was gathered in one place. They have collected the money from the rich people and from the poor people. Now everyone has become the same and are to be given the same amount of money. He went further to say that it will only take a short while before the rich become rich again and the poor people become poor again. Why is that? It is because everything begins and ends in the mind.
There are those who can do a lot more but are not doing a quarter of what they can do because they have refused to stretch their minds. As a matter of fact, a mind that refuses to stretch will soon become a misfit. When other people who have stretched their minds start talking, the un-stretched mind sounds absurd among them. He or she says things and they begin to wonder what century this person lives in or where in the world he came from.

You need to know that to refuse to stretch your mind is to deny yourself of how much you can get out of life. That is because someone who is probably born to be CEO of a multinational company might just die as a gate keeper. Another person who is supposed to become an international professor might simply remain a school teacher who is poorly paid. That world acclaimed instrumentalist predestined before birth might just remain the second choice instrumentalist in a local assembly of the church choir!

Until you stretch your mind, you will never know how far you can go. So how can you stretch your mind? My suggestions are:
  • Relate with bright minds to learn rather than proving you know something.
  • Go out. Visit nice places, sit down there and imagine yourself doing business with people there. I promise no one will be bold to send you out. If they ask what you are doing there, tell them you are waiting for a client. When you are tired of enjoying the environment tell them your client changed his mind.
  • Read the biographies of great people and see what they did to become great. Reading stretches your mind and it never returns it to its original state.
  • If you have the means, you can travel abroad once in a while to see how things are done in other countries. It will greatly help your mind. I am not saying your mind can’t stretch without going abroad but it does help.
  • Have a really big vision. A vision is something that will keep stretching your mind. When you think you are done with a part, another one shows up.
I will like to see you all operate with a really stretched mind. I should also add that you will get to a level in life when people pay you for your stretched mind, not necessarily as a speaker, but because they value your insight! A stretched mind is like an irresistible fine wine or like putting all the beauty in the world on one woman so go on and stretch your mind!

Cioa Amigos 

feliz quinta-feira 

Monday, 24 February 2014

Love Anyways

Today I want to share a Prayer. Have a blessed week 

My prayer:
Wonderful Father. I have been fighting depression all day and truth is I am losing the battle. My life is blessed and wonderful. I have no right to be feeling like this. You have been so generous to me, I should be on my knees thanking you but I am simply not there today

God, I am sorry that I can't do what I know I should. But, this is where I am at today. A mess. Thank you for loving me anyway.

What God Said Today:
My sweet daughter. What has brought  you to this place? What has you feeling like you are less than you should be? 

You are trying to live up to expectations that are not from me. I have no expectations of you other than to be who you are and to love. 

You were hearing my voice tonight. When in doubt, love anyway. When you are afraid that you are doing the wrong thing, love anyway. When you are afraid you are taking the wrong path, love anyway. When you see that your life is less than what you want it to be, love anyway. 

I really have the one job for you, love anyway. I will, I PROMISE, I WILL take care of everything else. I WILL. You just go ahead and love anyway